sacrifice and the emotional price

adjusting, pivoting,

but for who?

for love that asks me to shrink

so it can stay comfortable.

for peace that only exists

when i bite my tongue

until it bleeds.

for “us,”

when “us” means me

carrying the weight

of decisions i didn’t make,

living in places i didn’t choose,

settling into a life

i never pictured.

i keep calling it compromise.

but if i’m the only one willing to compromise,

then it turns into resentment

and resentment means

we never see eye to eye.

i crave devotion

but i can never give it to myself.

i abandon myself in slow motion,

in your name,

for the love of the game,

for the thrill of the pain.

sacrifice and the emotional price

they ran me dry,

left me empty

with nothing but effort

to show for it.

sacrifice and the emotional price

they take it all

and leave me with-

they see my cup half full.

i see it half empty.

but either way,

your next response is to pour.

pour into everyone else’s hands

but my own.

adjust and pivot.

and if you don’t have enough

to fill your own cup,

borrow from someone else.

but if i’m influenced by them,

doesn’t the cycle repeat?

adjusting and pivoting,

but for who?

lend a helping hand?

i’m out of limbs for your use.

sacrifice and the emotional price,

but the payment is getting high.

Can I get a price check?

when it’s always on me?

I run myself dry.

then complain about my pockets.