home from work.
keys to hook. bag down. shoes off.
snack.
call mom and dad.
and get to work.
nothing i have made recently has been mine, which i am actually ok with for the time being because it gives me some sense of routine and safety. i keep taking sewing gigs in an effort to pay down my credit card and electric bill. currently i feel too nebulous of a person to try to invent something.
this feeling i am also ok with. feeling quite hopeful/peaceful/relieved about the fact that i must intentionally suspend creativity for the sake of practice.
besides, i like the meditative thing that happens when i have a batch to cut. sewing the same curve 40 times and seeing myself get faster and cleaner on each run. feels like school.
I am on the phone with dani while hemming a pleated miniskirt. just as she delivers the punchline of her story, the plaid lines in the fabric align perfectly perpendicular to the hem of the skirt which is perfectly perpendicular to the pleat. and my shoulders drop a quarter of an inch. this is a perfect moment.
thinking a lot about "do what you want, lifestar"
i want to make things with my hands.
i want to clothe people. not to dress them –– "dressing" has a connotation of extravagance or showmanship –– e.g. "dress up," "set dressing," "under-dressed".
to say someone arrived to an occasion well-dressed means that they understood the social assignment, the inevitable perception by others (i am not knocking this as this is very important). but to say someone arrived well-clothed means they showed up to do some damn good work.
someone well-clothed shows up in the right shoe for standing, has pockets and weather-proofing and no fear.
of course, the most well-dressed individuals are well-clothed first and foremost, and get to do both. form following function or whateva.
how i see it, dressing is for the viewer – clothing is for the wearer (lifestar).
ON PERFECTION:
perfection is convenience. it's having smooth drawers and hinges, no resistance. it is a heavy no.8 zipper, lightly waxed for a bass-y pull. using the right materials for the right things. the ideal height of a stair. laces finished with the perfect length of aglet. jacquard care labels because there is no print to peel off, and high twist cotton yarns because tension is everything.
ON EASE:
ease is room to play. ease in sewing is defined as "the excess space provided in a garment beyond the wearer's body measurements." the purpose is to allow the wearer movement. it is the swing in your hip while walking in your favourite trousers. it is the little tee gap between waist and fabric that happens when you reach up to grab a mug out of the cupboard. it's an alluring quality and one that compounds on itself. ease is green lights all the way home.
there is no way to separate what i want in life from what i want out of clothing.
i want both to have ease and perfection. to feel freedom and restriction and make corrections and grow into and grow out of. to wear life, to put it on every day, familiar, beloved. and through this love, to be subject to change, damage, repair, change, damage, repair...