phantom pain in the form of feelings displacing me back into the hallway of our beginnings a difference between where i am physically, running shoes cradling my feet against concrete while my mind is not here nor there where i left you and you left me and i can’t remember anymore who actually did the leaving you come in flashes and it hurts when i keep it to myself disgusting when i spill it out these conversations about exhaustion, the crescendo to our ending — plurals disgust me